Hope Springeth New on the Horizon

by sarahmfry, October 04, 2010
So....Good news from sick bay.  After 5 days raging with fever, I finally  figured out that maybe this is more than a viral bug convention convening in every inch of my body.  SOMETHING has got to be infected.  So....great thinker that I am, I get to thinking that I have been thinking for awhile (like - for weeks) that maybe I was developing a sinus infection.  I've had almost constant congestion for no apparent reason.  So maybe, just maybe this sinus infection turned into an infection explosion that occurred during the annual viral bug convention.  And why, you ask, is this good news?  Very good question, my friend.  I'm glad you asked.

There is no known cure for the annual viral bug convention.  Dousing the little suckers with gallons of water, overloading them with vitamins and natural remedies and smothering them in sleep can give the illusion of progress for the afflicted convention host.  But the ugly truth is, those bugs ain't leaving until the convention's over, dude!  But infection?  Oh yeah, baby.  We've got ammo.  Bacterial Explosions and Viral Conventions are two totally different battles.  And while the Bacterial dudes tend to pack a more vicious punch, those little Viral devils will keep their slimy hold to the end.  So..back to our ammo.  Science, via my good friend Flemming,  has brought us penicillin!  And a lot of other "illins"  which are good for "killins"  the "villins". 

I need to stop right here and tell you that I am medicated.  Uh.  And I feel a little drunk.  Or. Something.  Maybe it's the small-iced-nonfat-caramel-latte-with-no-ice I picked up to give me the energy to accomplish today's impossible to-do list while my head spins.  After five days of Popsicles, maybe the caffeine was a little to much, too soon.  But I did get lost this morning.  IN FRANKFORT!  (shock) And I cried. (again, shock) And I'm just saying that I'm really woozy today.  So don't hold this post against me. Please.

So...back to the good news.  What I'm saying is, I think maybe the convention is over, the bugs have moved on to another host and I am left with a massive Bacterial Explosion that is nothing - I repeat NOTHING against half a bottle of slightly outdated Dicloxacillin from.......well......okay, from when Corin was born.

So - Basically I just used 373 words (literally - I checked) to proclaim that I think I might be on the road to recovery because I'm taking an old bottle of antibiotics from my fridge!  Told you it was good news.

And - as icing on this riveting story, I am nearly certain my werewolf eyes are going away, thanks to a magic little tube of stuff smuggled to my mother (legally and honestly, of course) from our midwife Nelda from the maternity ward.  Hmmm....interesting.....Just think how hopelessly sick I'd be right now if it weren't for having babies.

It's okay if these tidings of good news leave you feeling baffled and slightly confused.  Just bang your head against a hard surface for 5 days, set yourself on fire, jump into a tub of icy water then take drugs and caffeine on an empty stomach.  It'll make perfect sense. 

The fact that I'm sitting here alone in my house laughing out loud somehow troubles me.  Hope I'm okay.

Okie Dokie, then.  Lots and tons of work to be done before the caffeine wears off and the boys get home. 

Many many blessings upon you for reading these good tidings of great joy.

And may the force be with you.

I should have been using these valuable minutes of time, I suppose, to work on the article which is due TODAY.  But I ask you....Do I SOUND like I am in any condition to be writing an article of any kind? Really?  I rest my case.

I'd also like to say that I dedicate this post to my.....um....very refined, dignified almost-PhD husband.   Just wanna make you proud, Babe.

photo credits (not an endorsement of the sources):
pills:  reemerginginfectiousdiseases.wordpress.com
flemming: http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/shared/spl/hi/pop_ups/07/health_penicillin0_the_first_0wonder_drug0/html/2.stm
 crazy lady:  http://www.wonkydonky.net/archives/2008/06/vegetarians_at.php

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