Teacher Itch and the Bend in the Road
|Photo by Ksenia Makagonova|
I come from a family rich in educators. Last weekend my extended (Wolf) family went camping together. A highlight was sitting around after breakfast, sharing our teacher ideas and plans for the coming semester. We laughed together as we looked around the table and counted the teachers. Eight out of 10 adults present were teachers. I hope I never forget our conversation - taking turns telling what classes we are teaching, what we are excited about, asking questions and sharing practical and philosophical ideas. It was lovely.
Every year, when fall rolls around my teacher blood starts churning. I itch for a new planner, and a new classroom to decorate and ALL THE NEW BOOKS!
So I cozy up to my computer and drool over continuing degree programs and I spend long hours poring over my personal planner (full of teachery stuff like laundry and dishes and appointments.) Sometimes I submit my name for more information from an institution of higher learning or two - and the subsequent year of dodging their phone calls and emails.
And every year, I look at the tuitions costs, look around at my babies, re-evaluate my season, simmer down and go back to the laundry.
But this year, I'm not so sure I can simmer down. I've printed out two course plans, I've sheepishly entered my information into the blanks for "more info". I have decided that I will pretend money isn't even an issue and that I'm not already balancing a full plate or two.
I do not believe that my kids are done needing me after they start kindergarten. I do not believe that in 2 or 3 years when baby Carson starts Kindergarten that my mummying job will be over. But I do feel like there is a bend approaching in the road. There are rocks, too, in the road. But the trees are blazing autumn along the sides. And I am chomping at the bit.
There are so many ideas rumbling around in my head - ideas that combine my passion for family and parenting and training and trauma and pastoral care and counseling and neuroscience and theology and mentoring and community and the church. And how it is all connected in the most intriguing and necessary ways. My picture is getting clearer.
There are tears burning behind my eyes right now. Tears of excitement and frustration and passion. And I will settle down to reality and get back to the laundry....but I may have to take a step towards the direction my heart is tugging. Just one class, maybe?
For now, I decided to come back to blogging. I have things to share. Things to figure out. Things to think. So here we are.