As the deer pants for streams of water, so my soul pants for you, O God. ~ Psalm 42:1 (NIV) (Need a cup of fresh water this morning? Click here)
As I talked with an old friend recently at IHC, she told me that she is in a "good place." Meaning: Her spirit is quiet. She has joy. She is viewing the challenges of her life with strength and grace as God helps her. Why, I ask? Her answer, Prayer. Waiting. Sitting - in the mornings, until her soul has quieted long enough to open up with God and talk it out. "It changes me inside." She said.
And it reminded me how thirsty my soul is for extended quiet time.
I've been running a lot lately. A lot. And this weekend my spirit was showing signs of an unquiet heart. Cranky. Irritable. Dissatisfied. Definitely NOT refreshed.
So this morning I considered it a gift from God that my kiddos slept a little later than usual. But my time alone was short-lived. It is a practice of discipline for me to say, "No, you may not have your breakfast until Mamma is done. Yes, you may have some milk. But you'll have to wait."
But as I sat in the big chair in the living room (once again drinking in Eastman's A Celebration of Praise and A.W. Tozer's The Pursuit of Man), I could not ignore my son's quest to empty the snack drawer onto the floor -one item at a time. Had he pilfered carefully, perhaps I could have continued in quiet. But it was the vivacious pitching-and-plopping that made me nervous. A loaf of bread. Plop. A half-sack of chex mix. Pitch. A half bag of wheat flour. Bang. A can of pistachios. Smack. And I realized I simply must rescue my kitchen from certain destruction.
And so, I remembered why my spirit is thirsty. This is what happens.
Now, I know that the practical answer would be to get up an hour before the kids. But it is not uncommon for my children to wake up at 6:30 or 7:00, full of vim and vigor and ready for the day. And at this time in my life, one of the most spiritual things I can do for this mommy-body is to get as much sleep as possible. So I do not rise at 5:00 and sink into spiritual oblivion. Honestly, I look forward to the day when I can again. And I certainly believe in beginning the day quietly alone with God. But creativity is a must in this household. It seems that after breakfast or during nap times works better around here. But whenever it is, I am getting out the biggest sippy cup I can find and lifting it up to be filled.
Right now I have some other sippy cups to fill. The kids are asking for cake for breakfast. One needs an asthma treatment. Another is crankily teething. The dogs have been eating cereal and milk because we ran out of dog food (seriously!). Karissa informs me dramatically there's a fly in their room - a BIG one and the big ones are MEAN! The day has begun.
I need a date with my Abba.
And we press on. I think I'll turn on some Brooklyn Tab.
Abba, you know that I am thirsty for you. You know how to fill me. You know my frame, that I am dust. Thank you for loving me anyway. I am anxious to meet with you. Give me a moment today, Lord.
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